Thursday, June 11, 2009

When he's not an angel anymore...

Last night around 12:45am, I was up with Avery for a potty break and she was feeling rather conversational. I have some pretty amazing conversations with her. So, we were discussing potty training, and the little fringe benefits it brings, namely, treats from the potty bunny (Avery came up with this little character, not me I promise). Anyway, she was discussing how the potty bunny would bring treats to various babies we know when they get big, including her brother Landon, baby cousin and then her brother Everett. She talks about Everett so much, sometimes it really makes my stomach hurt.

"Everett won't need to potty train" I told her

"When he gets big he will" she said with sleepy, heavy eyes.

"Honey, Everett won't ever get big, he's an angel remember?" I tell her, softly, not sure how much she can comprehend at this time of the night, but she persists.

"When he's not an angel anymore he will, right?" she asks, I change the subject all together.

Based on conversations I have with her, Avery clearly doesn't quite "get" the whole death and Heaven business. She thinks its temporary, she thinks we can go there, she thinks he can come back. I like her version of Heaven more then reality some days. Wouldn't it be great if there came a day when Everett weren't an angel any more? When he came back from his little Heavenly vacation?

Yeah, that would be wonderful.


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